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Is it normal that my co-workers at a fitness company criticize my food choices?
How should I greet co-workers?Company mini-conference - How to engage co-workers?How do I encourage co-workers to recycle?Working for or accepting a position to a company that doesn't negotiate salaryMeasuring the adoption of a concept in a companyCultural Fit Interview - good idea to mention that I have interviewed with the same company before?Is it impolite to show interest in how co-workers perform their job?What are reasonable concerns to have in a company culture that is not meritocratic?How to handle “company strategy trip” that is actually a vacation trip?Contacted by a recruitment agency regarding a role working for a company that a mate of mine has just left
I was granted an H1B (United States) and was able to get hired after about a year. During the interview, I thought the company looked amazing as they are a fitness company and promote a healthy lifestyle in the workplace. Since joining, I feel like there was a lot that I didn't see between the lines during the interviews.
We have an open lunch period, but I've learned that people prefer to eat their meals on some sort of schedule. Similarly, it's very similar stuff ranging from protein shakes to plain boiled chicken. Because of this strange lunch timing, it's difficult for me to join them and when I do, people make comments about how I'm ruining my "macros" (I just eat Marie Calendar pot pies). There's also wildly snide remarks about some sort of syrup in my soda, which I don't quite understand.
The last real incident aside from snide remarks was the time I brought some Cheetos to a office party, to find out that everyone brought veg places and proceeded to dump the Cheetos away was mocking it.
Recently, I've been trying to acclimate to these changes and so far nothing else has happened, but I find it "different" from my normal lifestyle. I want to know if that these social pressures are normal and if it's reasonable for me try to fit in?
company-culture
New contributor
|
show 15 more comments
I was granted an H1B (United States) and was able to get hired after about a year. During the interview, I thought the company looked amazing as they are a fitness company and promote a healthy lifestyle in the workplace. Since joining, I feel like there was a lot that I didn't see between the lines during the interviews.
We have an open lunch period, but I've learned that people prefer to eat their meals on some sort of schedule. Similarly, it's very similar stuff ranging from protein shakes to plain boiled chicken. Because of this strange lunch timing, it's difficult for me to join them and when I do, people make comments about how I'm ruining my "macros" (I just eat Marie Calendar pot pies). There's also wildly snide remarks about some sort of syrup in my soda, which I don't quite understand.
The last real incident aside from snide remarks was the time I brought some Cheetos to a office party, to find out that everyone brought veg places and proceeded to dump the Cheetos away was mocking it.
Recently, I've been trying to acclimate to these changes and so far nothing else has happened, but I find it "different" from my normal lifestyle. I want to know if that these social pressures are normal and if it's reasonable for me try to fit in?
company-culture
New contributor
13
Yes, who doesn't want to fit in?
– Namelom
7 hours ago
7
As for the "Syrup in my soda" issue, I'd be guessing they're referring to High Fructose Corn Syrup, which is an artificial sweetener found in a whole lot of different foods in the US. But there do exist some sodas without it,, so if that matters to you, you can look up some of the other brands. But of course, nobody should be mocking you over what you drink.
– Davy M
5 hours ago
13
@DavyM - High Fructose Corn Syrup is no more artificial than sugar is.
– brhans
4 hours ago
4
@brhans: If it had been sugar they would've probably commented on the sugar in soda. i.e. I don't think it was singling out HFCS as being worse than sugar.
– Mehrdad
4 hours ago
4
@brhans You're one of them, aren't you! A corn lobbyist shilling for big corn! :P In all seriousness, though, the site you referenced is an open advocacy group for HFCS, so I would take their claims with a grain of sugar. I still believe you're right, but if you were wrong, that site would be the last one to bring it up.
– bvoyelr
4 hours ago
|
show 15 more comments
I was granted an H1B (United States) and was able to get hired after about a year. During the interview, I thought the company looked amazing as they are a fitness company and promote a healthy lifestyle in the workplace. Since joining, I feel like there was a lot that I didn't see between the lines during the interviews.
We have an open lunch period, but I've learned that people prefer to eat their meals on some sort of schedule. Similarly, it's very similar stuff ranging from protein shakes to plain boiled chicken. Because of this strange lunch timing, it's difficult for me to join them and when I do, people make comments about how I'm ruining my "macros" (I just eat Marie Calendar pot pies). There's also wildly snide remarks about some sort of syrup in my soda, which I don't quite understand.
The last real incident aside from snide remarks was the time I brought some Cheetos to a office party, to find out that everyone brought veg places and proceeded to dump the Cheetos away was mocking it.
Recently, I've been trying to acclimate to these changes and so far nothing else has happened, but I find it "different" from my normal lifestyle. I want to know if that these social pressures are normal and if it's reasonable for me try to fit in?
company-culture
New contributor
I was granted an H1B (United States) and was able to get hired after about a year. During the interview, I thought the company looked amazing as they are a fitness company and promote a healthy lifestyle in the workplace. Since joining, I feel like there was a lot that I didn't see between the lines during the interviews.
We have an open lunch period, but I've learned that people prefer to eat their meals on some sort of schedule. Similarly, it's very similar stuff ranging from protein shakes to plain boiled chicken. Because of this strange lunch timing, it's difficult for me to join them and when I do, people make comments about how I'm ruining my "macros" (I just eat Marie Calendar pot pies). There's also wildly snide remarks about some sort of syrup in my soda, which I don't quite understand.
The last real incident aside from snide remarks was the time I brought some Cheetos to a office party, to find out that everyone brought veg places and proceeded to dump the Cheetos away was mocking it.
Recently, I've been trying to acclimate to these changes and so far nothing else has happened, but I find it "different" from my normal lifestyle. I want to know if that these social pressures are normal and if it's reasonable for me try to fit in?
company-culture
company-culture
New contributor
New contributor
edited 19 mins ago
Andy Lester
1,307713
1,307713
New contributor
asked 8 hours ago
NamelomNamelom
10013
10013
New contributor
New contributor
13
Yes, who doesn't want to fit in?
– Namelom
7 hours ago
7
As for the "Syrup in my soda" issue, I'd be guessing they're referring to High Fructose Corn Syrup, which is an artificial sweetener found in a whole lot of different foods in the US. But there do exist some sodas without it,, so if that matters to you, you can look up some of the other brands. But of course, nobody should be mocking you over what you drink.
– Davy M
5 hours ago
13
@DavyM - High Fructose Corn Syrup is no more artificial than sugar is.
– brhans
4 hours ago
4
@brhans: If it had been sugar they would've probably commented on the sugar in soda. i.e. I don't think it was singling out HFCS as being worse than sugar.
– Mehrdad
4 hours ago
4
@brhans You're one of them, aren't you! A corn lobbyist shilling for big corn! :P In all seriousness, though, the site you referenced is an open advocacy group for HFCS, so I would take their claims with a grain of sugar. I still believe you're right, but if you were wrong, that site would be the last one to bring it up.
– bvoyelr
4 hours ago
|
show 15 more comments
13
Yes, who doesn't want to fit in?
– Namelom
7 hours ago
7
As for the "Syrup in my soda" issue, I'd be guessing they're referring to High Fructose Corn Syrup, which is an artificial sweetener found in a whole lot of different foods in the US. But there do exist some sodas without it,, so if that matters to you, you can look up some of the other brands. But of course, nobody should be mocking you over what you drink.
– Davy M
5 hours ago
13
@DavyM - High Fructose Corn Syrup is no more artificial than sugar is.
– brhans
4 hours ago
4
@brhans: If it had been sugar they would've probably commented on the sugar in soda. i.e. I don't think it was singling out HFCS as being worse than sugar.
– Mehrdad
4 hours ago
4
@brhans You're one of them, aren't you! A corn lobbyist shilling for big corn! :P In all seriousness, though, the site you referenced is an open advocacy group for HFCS, so I would take their claims with a grain of sugar. I still believe you're right, but if you were wrong, that site would be the last one to bring it up.
– bvoyelr
4 hours ago
13
13
Yes, who doesn't want to fit in?
– Namelom
7 hours ago
Yes, who doesn't want to fit in?
– Namelom
7 hours ago
7
7
As for the "Syrup in my soda" issue, I'd be guessing they're referring to High Fructose Corn Syrup, which is an artificial sweetener found in a whole lot of different foods in the US. But there do exist some sodas without it,, so if that matters to you, you can look up some of the other brands. But of course, nobody should be mocking you over what you drink.
– Davy M
5 hours ago
As for the "Syrup in my soda" issue, I'd be guessing they're referring to High Fructose Corn Syrup, which is an artificial sweetener found in a whole lot of different foods in the US. But there do exist some sodas without it,, so if that matters to you, you can look up some of the other brands. But of course, nobody should be mocking you over what you drink.
– Davy M
5 hours ago
13
13
@DavyM - High Fructose Corn Syrup is no more artificial than sugar is.
– brhans
4 hours ago
@DavyM - High Fructose Corn Syrup is no more artificial than sugar is.
– brhans
4 hours ago
4
4
@brhans: If it had been sugar they would've probably commented on the sugar in soda. i.e. I don't think it was singling out HFCS as being worse than sugar.
– Mehrdad
4 hours ago
@brhans: If it had been sugar they would've probably commented on the sugar in soda. i.e. I don't think it was singling out HFCS as being worse than sugar.
– Mehrdad
4 hours ago
4
4
@brhans You're one of them, aren't you! A corn lobbyist shilling for big corn! :P In all seriousness, though, the site you referenced is an open advocacy group for HFCS, so I would take their claims with a grain of sugar. I still believe you're right, but if you were wrong, that site would be the last one to bring it up.
– bvoyelr
4 hours ago
@brhans You're one of them, aren't you! A corn lobbyist shilling for big corn! :P In all seriousness, though, the site you referenced is an open advocacy group for HFCS, so I would take their claims with a grain of sugar. I still believe you're right, but if you were wrong, that site would be the last one to bring it up.
– bvoyelr
4 hours ago
|
show 15 more comments
5 Answers
5
active
oldest
votes
It sounds like you bit off a bit more than you can chew, so to speak, when applying to a fitness company which promotes a healthy lifestyle. Sounds like these people take it SERIOUSLY. While there is no excuse for insulting you in the workplace for anything like this and they're a bit over the line in my opinion, in this case it sounds like everyone does one thing and you're doing something else that they don't approve of. Normally I would say to raise this issue with HR because you're being bullied, but based on the way you've presented the issue, it sounds like a company culture thing, and you're just too far outside the culture. Meaning, you should start bringing plain boiled chicken or protein shakes for lunch, and bring veggies as party snacks, or this will continue.
EDIT: As for whether these sorts of pressures are normal, absolutely they are not. However, if literally everyone in the company, all the way from the lowest level to the CEO all does things one way, and you're the only person who doesn't, this is what happens. Not saying it's OK, but this organization sounds more like a cult than a company, and that's how cults do things.
14
Or as an alternative to switching what you eat, don't eat in the office where people can see you.
– David K
8 hours ago
2
@DavidK That's not a good way to address bullying and unprofessional behavior.
– Richard U
7 hours ago
2
@RichardU If you want to propose an alternative response in another answer, I'd be happy to consider it.
– David K
7 hours ago
2
@DavidK likewise. Let's not detract from Erta's answer by quibbling, lets both write answers of our own.
– Richard U
7 hours ago
Or as another alternative, start sending out the CV
– UKMonkey
5 hours ago
|
show 3 more comments
This sounds like blatant workplace bullying.
Forget for a moment that this is a fitness company, and just take all the affront's you've had to suffer.
- People make comments about how I'm ruining my "macros"
- There's also wildly snide remarks about some sort of syrup in my soda
- I brought some Cheetos to a office party, to find out that everyone brought veg places and proceeded to dump the Cheetos away was mocking it.
Recently, I've been trying to acclimate to these changes and so far nothing else has happened, but I find it "different" from my normal lifestyle. I want to know if that these social pressures are normal and if it's reasonable for me try to fit in?
Changing to fit in might cure the symptoms, but it won't cure the disease. This is essentially mobbing behavior and "othering" anyone who doesn't conform to their corporate culture in a very nasty way.
Start floating your resume. It has been my experience that once you have been "othered", you are not likely to ever fully fit in with the group, and even if you try to conform, they will find other excuses to engage in shaming behavior.
You don't need to put up with this abusive behavior. Be ready to move on if the behavior continues towards yourself, or anyone else.
2
Comments are not for extended discussion; this conversation has been moved to chat.
– Mister Positive♦
4 hours ago
@CodeSeeker if you work for Google and use an iPhone and Bing and an Echo, I would definitely expect you to get comments about it. Lots of companies have rules against using competitors' products in the office. That's not really the issue at hand though.
– Kat
3 hours ago
About being othered, this is called the "labeling theory" and is absolutely true.
– johnVonTrapp
2 hours ago
add a comment |
What you're describing is far from normal in general - you might see one or two "healthy eating zealots" in a company - but obviously they are easier to ignore.
The situation you find yourself probably has it's roots in the company being as you put it a "fitness company" and that perhaps a higher proportion of people who are going to be that way inclined. They probably aren't all zealots to that degree - but if there's enough of them it can become the dominant culture.
I'm not going to excuse their behavior - it's bullying and unacceptable IMHO, your dietary choices are none of their business and frankly they should shut the hell up. Unfortunately it sounds as if this culture is quite entrenched in this particular company so I think from a practical point of view trying to change or eliminate it yourself is going to be nigh on impossible.
So what to do?
It depends on how much it's affecting you really - you could just ignore them, do your work and refuse to engage. Eat what you want and to hell with them. On the other hand if it's really bothering you then you might have to look at polishing the CV and finding another company, it's not right, it's not fair but sometimes you just have to pick your battles.
That said you mention that the promotion of a healthy lifestyle was one of the things that attracted you to the company - if you want to change your diet for you, not to "fit in" or any such peer-pressure rubbish but because it's something you want to do anyway then I'd suggest seeking out a co-worker who you have something of a rapport with and hasn't caused any of these incidents and asking them if they would mind giving you some tips for eating healthier.
But (and I know I'm repeating myself here) only consider doing so if it's because you want to make a change for you. If you're happy with your diet/lifestyle then more power to you! No-one should feel pressured to change something like this because of childish bullies.
Good luck!
PS: To help you decipher some of their cryptic references:
"macros" probably refers to "macro-nutrients" e.g. Carbohydrate, Protein and Fat
"some sort of syrup in my soda" probably refers to High Fructose Corn Syrup, a syrup used to provide the sweetness in many US sodas.
And let's get something straight - these people's perception of what's 'healthy' is nowhere near reality. But for better or worse you're in a company where agreeing on those standards is an important cultural factor. So either you toe the line and pretend to be converted to their faddish perceptions, or you polish up the resume
– George M
3 hours ago
add a comment |
I was going to comment that the behaviour seems strange, like it was some sort of cult, but then I saw it was a fitness company.
I'm going to be honest with you, if you do decide to attempt to fit-in, it will take some work. To the point where it may be a significant lifestyle change, and not just at-work behaviour. You've already identified this.
The company says that it promotes a healthy lifestyle, and it seems that many of the employees, at least the ones in your team, take that to heart.
I'm inclined to say that it would be rather difficult for you to "fit in". If you really want to work there, and are not inclined to work to fit in, you can simply ride it out and they will get used to you. They will eventually get used to your eating habits. Do you otherwise have much in common with these people?
It's really a question for you and what your priorities are. It sounds like you travelled quite a way to find a job, so I wouldn't throw that all away because of a few snide remarks. Is the work enjoyable?
It's natural to want to fit in, but in this instance it may require more work than you are prepared to do.
If you do decide to give it a go, good luck!
1
-1 I'm unsure as to what this answer says that my answer (which you admitted to downvoting) does not.
– Ertai87
7 hours ago
@GregoryCurrie I think my rep will survive the hit
– Richard U
7 hours ago
@GregoryCurrie Ah my bad. I thought you downvoted my answer, and then posted your own which was a clone of mine, which would be kind of rude. Apparently SO won't let me change my vote on yours, so apologies for that.
– Ertai87
7 hours ago
1
@Ertai87 Don't sweat it. It is pretty similar. I'm going to delete all my comments here, cause they are a bit pointless. Feel free to do the same (but keep the justification for the downvote if ya want)
– Gregory Currie
7 hours ago
add a comment |
It's a fitness company, but from what I could see the problem is the other employees behaving. I think you have as most people that follow the mainstream not is what considered an healthy food balance, normally very high on carbohydrates like refine sugars and starchy foods.
The problem in my opinion is in the mode of snark comments you receive on what you're eating, and not giving you advice on how to improve yourself.
I think that unfortunately you are in a bad position and you are in the position of the lazy fat guy or some such. I think you should in the medium term seek a new workplace, or if it's possible for you to go to eat outside. Maybe the nice girl at the grocery store is more bell behaved...
add a comment |
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5 Answers
5
active
oldest
votes
5 Answers
5
active
oldest
votes
active
oldest
votes
active
oldest
votes
It sounds like you bit off a bit more than you can chew, so to speak, when applying to a fitness company which promotes a healthy lifestyle. Sounds like these people take it SERIOUSLY. While there is no excuse for insulting you in the workplace for anything like this and they're a bit over the line in my opinion, in this case it sounds like everyone does one thing and you're doing something else that they don't approve of. Normally I would say to raise this issue with HR because you're being bullied, but based on the way you've presented the issue, it sounds like a company culture thing, and you're just too far outside the culture. Meaning, you should start bringing plain boiled chicken or protein shakes for lunch, and bring veggies as party snacks, or this will continue.
EDIT: As for whether these sorts of pressures are normal, absolutely they are not. However, if literally everyone in the company, all the way from the lowest level to the CEO all does things one way, and you're the only person who doesn't, this is what happens. Not saying it's OK, but this organization sounds more like a cult than a company, and that's how cults do things.
14
Or as an alternative to switching what you eat, don't eat in the office where people can see you.
– David K
8 hours ago
2
@DavidK That's not a good way to address bullying and unprofessional behavior.
– Richard U
7 hours ago
2
@RichardU If you want to propose an alternative response in another answer, I'd be happy to consider it.
– David K
7 hours ago
2
@DavidK likewise. Let's not detract from Erta's answer by quibbling, lets both write answers of our own.
– Richard U
7 hours ago
Or as another alternative, start sending out the CV
– UKMonkey
5 hours ago
|
show 3 more comments
It sounds like you bit off a bit more than you can chew, so to speak, when applying to a fitness company which promotes a healthy lifestyle. Sounds like these people take it SERIOUSLY. While there is no excuse for insulting you in the workplace for anything like this and they're a bit over the line in my opinion, in this case it sounds like everyone does one thing and you're doing something else that they don't approve of. Normally I would say to raise this issue with HR because you're being bullied, but based on the way you've presented the issue, it sounds like a company culture thing, and you're just too far outside the culture. Meaning, you should start bringing plain boiled chicken or protein shakes for lunch, and bring veggies as party snacks, or this will continue.
EDIT: As for whether these sorts of pressures are normal, absolutely they are not. However, if literally everyone in the company, all the way from the lowest level to the CEO all does things one way, and you're the only person who doesn't, this is what happens. Not saying it's OK, but this organization sounds more like a cult than a company, and that's how cults do things.
14
Or as an alternative to switching what you eat, don't eat in the office where people can see you.
– David K
8 hours ago
2
@DavidK That's not a good way to address bullying and unprofessional behavior.
– Richard U
7 hours ago
2
@RichardU If you want to propose an alternative response in another answer, I'd be happy to consider it.
– David K
7 hours ago
2
@DavidK likewise. Let's not detract from Erta's answer by quibbling, lets both write answers of our own.
– Richard U
7 hours ago
Or as another alternative, start sending out the CV
– UKMonkey
5 hours ago
|
show 3 more comments
It sounds like you bit off a bit more than you can chew, so to speak, when applying to a fitness company which promotes a healthy lifestyle. Sounds like these people take it SERIOUSLY. While there is no excuse for insulting you in the workplace for anything like this and they're a bit over the line in my opinion, in this case it sounds like everyone does one thing and you're doing something else that they don't approve of. Normally I would say to raise this issue with HR because you're being bullied, but based on the way you've presented the issue, it sounds like a company culture thing, and you're just too far outside the culture. Meaning, you should start bringing plain boiled chicken or protein shakes for lunch, and bring veggies as party snacks, or this will continue.
EDIT: As for whether these sorts of pressures are normal, absolutely they are not. However, if literally everyone in the company, all the way from the lowest level to the CEO all does things one way, and you're the only person who doesn't, this is what happens. Not saying it's OK, but this organization sounds more like a cult than a company, and that's how cults do things.
It sounds like you bit off a bit more than you can chew, so to speak, when applying to a fitness company which promotes a healthy lifestyle. Sounds like these people take it SERIOUSLY. While there is no excuse for insulting you in the workplace for anything like this and they're a bit over the line in my opinion, in this case it sounds like everyone does one thing and you're doing something else that they don't approve of. Normally I would say to raise this issue with HR because you're being bullied, but based on the way you've presented the issue, it sounds like a company culture thing, and you're just too far outside the culture. Meaning, you should start bringing plain boiled chicken or protein shakes for lunch, and bring veggies as party snacks, or this will continue.
EDIT: As for whether these sorts of pressures are normal, absolutely they are not. However, if literally everyone in the company, all the way from the lowest level to the CEO all does things one way, and you're the only person who doesn't, this is what happens. Not saying it's OK, but this organization sounds more like a cult than a company, and that's how cults do things.
edited 7 hours ago
answered 8 hours ago
Ertai87Ertai87
10.4k21230
10.4k21230
14
Or as an alternative to switching what you eat, don't eat in the office where people can see you.
– David K
8 hours ago
2
@DavidK That's not a good way to address bullying and unprofessional behavior.
– Richard U
7 hours ago
2
@RichardU If you want to propose an alternative response in another answer, I'd be happy to consider it.
– David K
7 hours ago
2
@DavidK likewise. Let's not detract from Erta's answer by quibbling, lets both write answers of our own.
– Richard U
7 hours ago
Or as another alternative, start sending out the CV
– UKMonkey
5 hours ago
|
show 3 more comments
14
Or as an alternative to switching what you eat, don't eat in the office where people can see you.
– David K
8 hours ago
2
@DavidK That's not a good way to address bullying and unprofessional behavior.
– Richard U
7 hours ago
2
@RichardU If you want to propose an alternative response in another answer, I'd be happy to consider it.
– David K
7 hours ago
2
@DavidK likewise. Let's not detract from Erta's answer by quibbling, lets both write answers of our own.
– Richard U
7 hours ago
Or as another alternative, start sending out the CV
– UKMonkey
5 hours ago
14
14
Or as an alternative to switching what you eat, don't eat in the office where people can see you.
– David K
8 hours ago
Or as an alternative to switching what you eat, don't eat in the office where people can see you.
– David K
8 hours ago
2
2
@DavidK That's not a good way to address bullying and unprofessional behavior.
– Richard U
7 hours ago
@DavidK That's not a good way to address bullying and unprofessional behavior.
– Richard U
7 hours ago
2
2
@RichardU If you want to propose an alternative response in another answer, I'd be happy to consider it.
– David K
7 hours ago
@RichardU If you want to propose an alternative response in another answer, I'd be happy to consider it.
– David K
7 hours ago
2
2
@DavidK likewise. Let's not detract from Erta's answer by quibbling, lets both write answers of our own.
– Richard U
7 hours ago
@DavidK likewise. Let's not detract from Erta's answer by quibbling, lets both write answers of our own.
– Richard U
7 hours ago
Or as another alternative, start sending out the CV
– UKMonkey
5 hours ago
Or as another alternative, start sending out the CV
– UKMonkey
5 hours ago
|
show 3 more comments
This sounds like blatant workplace bullying.
Forget for a moment that this is a fitness company, and just take all the affront's you've had to suffer.
- People make comments about how I'm ruining my "macros"
- There's also wildly snide remarks about some sort of syrup in my soda
- I brought some Cheetos to a office party, to find out that everyone brought veg places and proceeded to dump the Cheetos away was mocking it.
Recently, I've been trying to acclimate to these changes and so far nothing else has happened, but I find it "different" from my normal lifestyle. I want to know if that these social pressures are normal and if it's reasonable for me try to fit in?
Changing to fit in might cure the symptoms, but it won't cure the disease. This is essentially mobbing behavior and "othering" anyone who doesn't conform to their corporate culture in a very nasty way.
Start floating your resume. It has been my experience that once you have been "othered", you are not likely to ever fully fit in with the group, and even if you try to conform, they will find other excuses to engage in shaming behavior.
You don't need to put up with this abusive behavior. Be ready to move on if the behavior continues towards yourself, or anyone else.
2
Comments are not for extended discussion; this conversation has been moved to chat.
– Mister Positive♦
4 hours ago
@CodeSeeker if you work for Google and use an iPhone and Bing and an Echo, I would definitely expect you to get comments about it. Lots of companies have rules against using competitors' products in the office. That's not really the issue at hand though.
– Kat
3 hours ago
About being othered, this is called the "labeling theory" and is absolutely true.
– johnVonTrapp
2 hours ago
add a comment |
This sounds like blatant workplace bullying.
Forget for a moment that this is a fitness company, and just take all the affront's you've had to suffer.
- People make comments about how I'm ruining my "macros"
- There's also wildly snide remarks about some sort of syrup in my soda
- I brought some Cheetos to a office party, to find out that everyone brought veg places and proceeded to dump the Cheetos away was mocking it.
Recently, I've been trying to acclimate to these changes and so far nothing else has happened, but I find it "different" from my normal lifestyle. I want to know if that these social pressures are normal and if it's reasonable for me try to fit in?
Changing to fit in might cure the symptoms, but it won't cure the disease. This is essentially mobbing behavior and "othering" anyone who doesn't conform to their corporate culture in a very nasty way.
Start floating your resume. It has been my experience that once you have been "othered", you are not likely to ever fully fit in with the group, and even if you try to conform, they will find other excuses to engage in shaming behavior.
You don't need to put up with this abusive behavior. Be ready to move on if the behavior continues towards yourself, or anyone else.
2
Comments are not for extended discussion; this conversation has been moved to chat.
– Mister Positive♦
4 hours ago
@CodeSeeker if you work for Google and use an iPhone and Bing and an Echo, I would definitely expect you to get comments about it. Lots of companies have rules against using competitors' products in the office. That's not really the issue at hand though.
– Kat
3 hours ago
About being othered, this is called the "labeling theory" and is absolutely true.
– johnVonTrapp
2 hours ago
add a comment |
This sounds like blatant workplace bullying.
Forget for a moment that this is a fitness company, and just take all the affront's you've had to suffer.
- People make comments about how I'm ruining my "macros"
- There's also wildly snide remarks about some sort of syrup in my soda
- I brought some Cheetos to a office party, to find out that everyone brought veg places and proceeded to dump the Cheetos away was mocking it.
Recently, I've been trying to acclimate to these changes and so far nothing else has happened, but I find it "different" from my normal lifestyle. I want to know if that these social pressures are normal and if it's reasonable for me try to fit in?
Changing to fit in might cure the symptoms, but it won't cure the disease. This is essentially mobbing behavior and "othering" anyone who doesn't conform to their corporate culture in a very nasty way.
Start floating your resume. It has been my experience that once you have been "othered", you are not likely to ever fully fit in with the group, and even if you try to conform, they will find other excuses to engage in shaming behavior.
You don't need to put up with this abusive behavior. Be ready to move on if the behavior continues towards yourself, or anyone else.
This sounds like blatant workplace bullying.
Forget for a moment that this is a fitness company, and just take all the affront's you've had to suffer.
- People make comments about how I'm ruining my "macros"
- There's also wildly snide remarks about some sort of syrup in my soda
- I brought some Cheetos to a office party, to find out that everyone brought veg places and proceeded to dump the Cheetos away was mocking it.
Recently, I've been trying to acclimate to these changes and so far nothing else has happened, but I find it "different" from my normal lifestyle. I want to know if that these social pressures are normal and if it's reasonable for me try to fit in?
Changing to fit in might cure the symptoms, but it won't cure the disease. This is essentially mobbing behavior and "othering" anyone who doesn't conform to their corporate culture in a very nasty way.
Start floating your resume. It has been my experience that once you have been "othered", you are not likely to ever fully fit in with the group, and even if you try to conform, they will find other excuses to engage in shaming behavior.
You don't need to put up with this abusive behavior. Be ready to move on if the behavior continues towards yourself, or anyone else.
answered 7 hours ago
Richard URichard U
100k73271403
100k73271403
2
Comments are not for extended discussion; this conversation has been moved to chat.
– Mister Positive♦
4 hours ago
@CodeSeeker if you work for Google and use an iPhone and Bing and an Echo, I would definitely expect you to get comments about it. Lots of companies have rules against using competitors' products in the office. That's not really the issue at hand though.
– Kat
3 hours ago
About being othered, this is called the "labeling theory" and is absolutely true.
– johnVonTrapp
2 hours ago
add a comment |
2
Comments are not for extended discussion; this conversation has been moved to chat.
– Mister Positive♦
4 hours ago
@CodeSeeker if you work for Google and use an iPhone and Bing and an Echo, I would definitely expect you to get comments about it. Lots of companies have rules against using competitors' products in the office. That's not really the issue at hand though.
– Kat
3 hours ago
About being othered, this is called the "labeling theory" and is absolutely true.
– johnVonTrapp
2 hours ago
2
2
Comments are not for extended discussion; this conversation has been moved to chat.
– Mister Positive♦
4 hours ago
Comments are not for extended discussion; this conversation has been moved to chat.
– Mister Positive♦
4 hours ago
@CodeSeeker if you work for Google and use an iPhone and Bing and an Echo, I would definitely expect you to get comments about it. Lots of companies have rules against using competitors' products in the office. That's not really the issue at hand though.
– Kat
3 hours ago
@CodeSeeker if you work for Google and use an iPhone and Bing and an Echo, I would definitely expect you to get comments about it. Lots of companies have rules against using competitors' products in the office. That's not really the issue at hand though.
– Kat
3 hours ago
About being othered, this is called the "labeling theory" and is absolutely true.
– johnVonTrapp
2 hours ago
About being othered, this is called the "labeling theory" and is absolutely true.
– johnVonTrapp
2 hours ago
add a comment |
What you're describing is far from normal in general - you might see one or two "healthy eating zealots" in a company - but obviously they are easier to ignore.
The situation you find yourself probably has it's roots in the company being as you put it a "fitness company" and that perhaps a higher proportion of people who are going to be that way inclined. They probably aren't all zealots to that degree - but if there's enough of them it can become the dominant culture.
I'm not going to excuse their behavior - it's bullying and unacceptable IMHO, your dietary choices are none of their business and frankly they should shut the hell up. Unfortunately it sounds as if this culture is quite entrenched in this particular company so I think from a practical point of view trying to change or eliminate it yourself is going to be nigh on impossible.
So what to do?
It depends on how much it's affecting you really - you could just ignore them, do your work and refuse to engage. Eat what you want and to hell with them. On the other hand if it's really bothering you then you might have to look at polishing the CV and finding another company, it's not right, it's not fair but sometimes you just have to pick your battles.
That said you mention that the promotion of a healthy lifestyle was one of the things that attracted you to the company - if you want to change your diet for you, not to "fit in" or any such peer-pressure rubbish but because it's something you want to do anyway then I'd suggest seeking out a co-worker who you have something of a rapport with and hasn't caused any of these incidents and asking them if they would mind giving you some tips for eating healthier.
But (and I know I'm repeating myself here) only consider doing so if it's because you want to make a change for you. If you're happy with your diet/lifestyle then more power to you! No-one should feel pressured to change something like this because of childish bullies.
Good luck!
PS: To help you decipher some of their cryptic references:
"macros" probably refers to "macro-nutrients" e.g. Carbohydrate, Protein and Fat
"some sort of syrup in my soda" probably refers to High Fructose Corn Syrup, a syrup used to provide the sweetness in many US sodas.
And let's get something straight - these people's perception of what's 'healthy' is nowhere near reality. But for better or worse you're in a company where agreeing on those standards is an important cultural factor. So either you toe the line and pretend to be converted to their faddish perceptions, or you polish up the resume
– George M
3 hours ago
add a comment |
What you're describing is far from normal in general - you might see one or two "healthy eating zealots" in a company - but obviously they are easier to ignore.
The situation you find yourself probably has it's roots in the company being as you put it a "fitness company" and that perhaps a higher proportion of people who are going to be that way inclined. They probably aren't all zealots to that degree - but if there's enough of them it can become the dominant culture.
I'm not going to excuse their behavior - it's bullying and unacceptable IMHO, your dietary choices are none of their business and frankly they should shut the hell up. Unfortunately it sounds as if this culture is quite entrenched in this particular company so I think from a practical point of view trying to change or eliminate it yourself is going to be nigh on impossible.
So what to do?
It depends on how much it's affecting you really - you could just ignore them, do your work and refuse to engage. Eat what you want and to hell with them. On the other hand if it's really bothering you then you might have to look at polishing the CV and finding another company, it's not right, it's not fair but sometimes you just have to pick your battles.
That said you mention that the promotion of a healthy lifestyle was one of the things that attracted you to the company - if you want to change your diet for you, not to "fit in" or any such peer-pressure rubbish but because it's something you want to do anyway then I'd suggest seeking out a co-worker who you have something of a rapport with and hasn't caused any of these incidents and asking them if they would mind giving you some tips for eating healthier.
But (and I know I'm repeating myself here) only consider doing so if it's because you want to make a change for you. If you're happy with your diet/lifestyle then more power to you! No-one should feel pressured to change something like this because of childish bullies.
Good luck!
PS: To help you decipher some of their cryptic references:
"macros" probably refers to "macro-nutrients" e.g. Carbohydrate, Protein and Fat
"some sort of syrup in my soda" probably refers to High Fructose Corn Syrup, a syrup used to provide the sweetness in many US sodas.
And let's get something straight - these people's perception of what's 'healthy' is nowhere near reality. But for better or worse you're in a company where agreeing on those standards is an important cultural factor. So either you toe the line and pretend to be converted to their faddish perceptions, or you polish up the resume
– George M
3 hours ago
add a comment |
What you're describing is far from normal in general - you might see one or two "healthy eating zealots" in a company - but obviously they are easier to ignore.
The situation you find yourself probably has it's roots in the company being as you put it a "fitness company" and that perhaps a higher proportion of people who are going to be that way inclined. They probably aren't all zealots to that degree - but if there's enough of them it can become the dominant culture.
I'm not going to excuse their behavior - it's bullying and unacceptable IMHO, your dietary choices are none of their business and frankly they should shut the hell up. Unfortunately it sounds as if this culture is quite entrenched in this particular company so I think from a practical point of view trying to change or eliminate it yourself is going to be nigh on impossible.
So what to do?
It depends on how much it's affecting you really - you could just ignore them, do your work and refuse to engage. Eat what you want and to hell with them. On the other hand if it's really bothering you then you might have to look at polishing the CV and finding another company, it's not right, it's not fair but sometimes you just have to pick your battles.
That said you mention that the promotion of a healthy lifestyle was one of the things that attracted you to the company - if you want to change your diet for you, not to "fit in" or any such peer-pressure rubbish but because it's something you want to do anyway then I'd suggest seeking out a co-worker who you have something of a rapport with and hasn't caused any of these incidents and asking them if they would mind giving you some tips for eating healthier.
But (and I know I'm repeating myself here) only consider doing so if it's because you want to make a change for you. If you're happy with your diet/lifestyle then more power to you! No-one should feel pressured to change something like this because of childish bullies.
Good luck!
PS: To help you decipher some of their cryptic references:
"macros" probably refers to "macro-nutrients" e.g. Carbohydrate, Protein and Fat
"some sort of syrup in my soda" probably refers to High Fructose Corn Syrup, a syrup used to provide the sweetness in many US sodas.
What you're describing is far from normal in general - you might see one or two "healthy eating zealots" in a company - but obviously they are easier to ignore.
The situation you find yourself probably has it's roots in the company being as you put it a "fitness company" and that perhaps a higher proportion of people who are going to be that way inclined. They probably aren't all zealots to that degree - but if there's enough of them it can become the dominant culture.
I'm not going to excuse their behavior - it's bullying and unacceptable IMHO, your dietary choices are none of their business and frankly they should shut the hell up. Unfortunately it sounds as if this culture is quite entrenched in this particular company so I think from a practical point of view trying to change or eliminate it yourself is going to be nigh on impossible.
So what to do?
It depends on how much it's affecting you really - you could just ignore them, do your work and refuse to engage. Eat what you want and to hell with them. On the other hand if it's really bothering you then you might have to look at polishing the CV and finding another company, it's not right, it's not fair but sometimes you just have to pick your battles.
That said you mention that the promotion of a healthy lifestyle was one of the things that attracted you to the company - if you want to change your diet for you, not to "fit in" or any such peer-pressure rubbish but because it's something you want to do anyway then I'd suggest seeking out a co-worker who you have something of a rapport with and hasn't caused any of these incidents and asking them if they would mind giving you some tips for eating healthier.
But (and I know I'm repeating myself here) only consider doing so if it's because you want to make a change for you. If you're happy with your diet/lifestyle then more power to you! No-one should feel pressured to change something like this because of childish bullies.
Good luck!
PS: To help you decipher some of their cryptic references:
"macros" probably refers to "macro-nutrients" e.g. Carbohydrate, Protein and Fat
"some sort of syrup in my soda" probably refers to High Fructose Corn Syrup, a syrup used to provide the sweetness in many US sodas.
answered 7 hours ago
motosubatsumotosubatsu
50.7k27135201
50.7k27135201
And let's get something straight - these people's perception of what's 'healthy' is nowhere near reality. But for better or worse you're in a company where agreeing on those standards is an important cultural factor. So either you toe the line and pretend to be converted to their faddish perceptions, or you polish up the resume
– George M
3 hours ago
add a comment |
And let's get something straight - these people's perception of what's 'healthy' is nowhere near reality. But for better or worse you're in a company where agreeing on those standards is an important cultural factor. So either you toe the line and pretend to be converted to their faddish perceptions, or you polish up the resume
– George M
3 hours ago
And let's get something straight - these people's perception of what's 'healthy' is nowhere near reality. But for better or worse you're in a company where agreeing on those standards is an important cultural factor. So either you toe the line and pretend to be converted to their faddish perceptions, or you polish up the resume
– George M
3 hours ago
And let's get something straight - these people's perception of what's 'healthy' is nowhere near reality. But for better or worse you're in a company where agreeing on those standards is an important cultural factor. So either you toe the line and pretend to be converted to their faddish perceptions, or you polish up the resume
– George M
3 hours ago
add a comment |
I was going to comment that the behaviour seems strange, like it was some sort of cult, but then I saw it was a fitness company.
I'm going to be honest with you, if you do decide to attempt to fit-in, it will take some work. To the point where it may be a significant lifestyle change, and not just at-work behaviour. You've already identified this.
The company says that it promotes a healthy lifestyle, and it seems that many of the employees, at least the ones in your team, take that to heart.
I'm inclined to say that it would be rather difficult for you to "fit in". If you really want to work there, and are not inclined to work to fit in, you can simply ride it out and they will get used to you. They will eventually get used to your eating habits. Do you otherwise have much in common with these people?
It's really a question for you and what your priorities are. It sounds like you travelled quite a way to find a job, so I wouldn't throw that all away because of a few snide remarks. Is the work enjoyable?
It's natural to want to fit in, but in this instance it may require more work than you are prepared to do.
If you do decide to give it a go, good luck!
1
-1 I'm unsure as to what this answer says that my answer (which you admitted to downvoting) does not.
– Ertai87
7 hours ago
@GregoryCurrie I think my rep will survive the hit
– Richard U
7 hours ago
@GregoryCurrie Ah my bad. I thought you downvoted my answer, and then posted your own which was a clone of mine, which would be kind of rude. Apparently SO won't let me change my vote on yours, so apologies for that.
– Ertai87
7 hours ago
1
@Ertai87 Don't sweat it. It is pretty similar. I'm going to delete all my comments here, cause they are a bit pointless. Feel free to do the same (but keep the justification for the downvote if ya want)
– Gregory Currie
7 hours ago
add a comment |
I was going to comment that the behaviour seems strange, like it was some sort of cult, but then I saw it was a fitness company.
I'm going to be honest with you, if you do decide to attempt to fit-in, it will take some work. To the point where it may be a significant lifestyle change, and not just at-work behaviour. You've already identified this.
The company says that it promotes a healthy lifestyle, and it seems that many of the employees, at least the ones in your team, take that to heart.
I'm inclined to say that it would be rather difficult for you to "fit in". If you really want to work there, and are not inclined to work to fit in, you can simply ride it out and they will get used to you. They will eventually get used to your eating habits. Do you otherwise have much in common with these people?
It's really a question for you and what your priorities are. It sounds like you travelled quite a way to find a job, so I wouldn't throw that all away because of a few snide remarks. Is the work enjoyable?
It's natural to want to fit in, but in this instance it may require more work than you are prepared to do.
If you do decide to give it a go, good luck!
1
-1 I'm unsure as to what this answer says that my answer (which you admitted to downvoting) does not.
– Ertai87
7 hours ago
@GregoryCurrie I think my rep will survive the hit
– Richard U
7 hours ago
@GregoryCurrie Ah my bad. I thought you downvoted my answer, and then posted your own which was a clone of mine, which would be kind of rude. Apparently SO won't let me change my vote on yours, so apologies for that.
– Ertai87
7 hours ago
1
@Ertai87 Don't sweat it. It is pretty similar. I'm going to delete all my comments here, cause they are a bit pointless. Feel free to do the same (but keep the justification for the downvote if ya want)
– Gregory Currie
7 hours ago
add a comment |
I was going to comment that the behaviour seems strange, like it was some sort of cult, but then I saw it was a fitness company.
I'm going to be honest with you, if you do decide to attempt to fit-in, it will take some work. To the point where it may be a significant lifestyle change, and not just at-work behaviour. You've already identified this.
The company says that it promotes a healthy lifestyle, and it seems that many of the employees, at least the ones in your team, take that to heart.
I'm inclined to say that it would be rather difficult for you to "fit in". If you really want to work there, and are not inclined to work to fit in, you can simply ride it out and they will get used to you. They will eventually get used to your eating habits. Do you otherwise have much in common with these people?
It's really a question for you and what your priorities are. It sounds like you travelled quite a way to find a job, so I wouldn't throw that all away because of a few snide remarks. Is the work enjoyable?
It's natural to want to fit in, but in this instance it may require more work than you are prepared to do.
If you do decide to give it a go, good luck!
I was going to comment that the behaviour seems strange, like it was some sort of cult, but then I saw it was a fitness company.
I'm going to be honest with you, if you do decide to attempt to fit-in, it will take some work. To the point where it may be a significant lifestyle change, and not just at-work behaviour. You've already identified this.
The company says that it promotes a healthy lifestyle, and it seems that many of the employees, at least the ones in your team, take that to heart.
I'm inclined to say that it would be rather difficult for you to "fit in". If you really want to work there, and are not inclined to work to fit in, you can simply ride it out and they will get used to you. They will eventually get used to your eating habits. Do you otherwise have much in common with these people?
It's really a question for you and what your priorities are. It sounds like you travelled quite a way to find a job, so I wouldn't throw that all away because of a few snide remarks. Is the work enjoyable?
It's natural to want to fit in, but in this instance it may require more work than you are prepared to do.
If you do decide to give it a go, good luck!
answered 7 hours ago
Gregory CurrieGregory Currie
1,3871614
1,3871614
1
-1 I'm unsure as to what this answer says that my answer (which you admitted to downvoting) does not.
– Ertai87
7 hours ago
@GregoryCurrie I think my rep will survive the hit
– Richard U
7 hours ago
@GregoryCurrie Ah my bad. I thought you downvoted my answer, and then posted your own which was a clone of mine, which would be kind of rude. Apparently SO won't let me change my vote on yours, so apologies for that.
– Ertai87
7 hours ago
1
@Ertai87 Don't sweat it. It is pretty similar. I'm going to delete all my comments here, cause they are a bit pointless. Feel free to do the same (but keep the justification for the downvote if ya want)
– Gregory Currie
7 hours ago
add a comment |
1
-1 I'm unsure as to what this answer says that my answer (which you admitted to downvoting) does not.
– Ertai87
7 hours ago
@GregoryCurrie I think my rep will survive the hit
– Richard U
7 hours ago
@GregoryCurrie Ah my bad. I thought you downvoted my answer, and then posted your own which was a clone of mine, which would be kind of rude. Apparently SO won't let me change my vote on yours, so apologies for that.
– Ertai87
7 hours ago
1
@Ertai87 Don't sweat it. It is pretty similar. I'm going to delete all my comments here, cause they are a bit pointless. Feel free to do the same (but keep the justification for the downvote if ya want)
– Gregory Currie
7 hours ago
1
1
-1 I'm unsure as to what this answer says that my answer (which you admitted to downvoting) does not.
– Ertai87
7 hours ago
-1 I'm unsure as to what this answer says that my answer (which you admitted to downvoting) does not.
– Ertai87
7 hours ago
@GregoryCurrie I think my rep will survive the hit
– Richard U
7 hours ago
@GregoryCurrie I think my rep will survive the hit
– Richard U
7 hours ago
@GregoryCurrie Ah my bad. I thought you downvoted my answer, and then posted your own which was a clone of mine, which would be kind of rude. Apparently SO won't let me change my vote on yours, so apologies for that.
– Ertai87
7 hours ago
@GregoryCurrie Ah my bad. I thought you downvoted my answer, and then posted your own which was a clone of mine, which would be kind of rude. Apparently SO won't let me change my vote on yours, so apologies for that.
– Ertai87
7 hours ago
1
1
@Ertai87 Don't sweat it. It is pretty similar. I'm going to delete all my comments here, cause they are a bit pointless. Feel free to do the same (but keep the justification for the downvote if ya want)
– Gregory Currie
7 hours ago
@Ertai87 Don't sweat it. It is pretty similar. I'm going to delete all my comments here, cause they are a bit pointless. Feel free to do the same (but keep the justification for the downvote if ya want)
– Gregory Currie
7 hours ago
add a comment |
It's a fitness company, but from what I could see the problem is the other employees behaving. I think you have as most people that follow the mainstream not is what considered an healthy food balance, normally very high on carbohydrates like refine sugars and starchy foods.
The problem in my opinion is in the mode of snark comments you receive on what you're eating, and not giving you advice on how to improve yourself.
I think that unfortunately you are in a bad position and you are in the position of the lazy fat guy or some such. I think you should in the medium term seek a new workplace, or if it's possible for you to go to eat outside. Maybe the nice girl at the grocery store is more bell behaved...
add a comment |
It's a fitness company, but from what I could see the problem is the other employees behaving. I think you have as most people that follow the mainstream not is what considered an healthy food balance, normally very high on carbohydrates like refine sugars and starchy foods.
The problem in my opinion is in the mode of snark comments you receive on what you're eating, and not giving you advice on how to improve yourself.
I think that unfortunately you are in a bad position and you are in the position of the lazy fat guy or some such. I think you should in the medium term seek a new workplace, or if it's possible for you to go to eat outside. Maybe the nice girl at the grocery store is more bell behaved...
add a comment |
It's a fitness company, but from what I could see the problem is the other employees behaving. I think you have as most people that follow the mainstream not is what considered an healthy food balance, normally very high on carbohydrates like refine sugars and starchy foods.
The problem in my opinion is in the mode of snark comments you receive on what you're eating, and not giving you advice on how to improve yourself.
I think that unfortunately you are in a bad position and you are in the position of the lazy fat guy or some such. I think you should in the medium term seek a new workplace, or if it's possible for you to go to eat outside. Maybe the nice girl at the grocery store is more bell behaved...
It's a fitness company, but from what I could see the problem is the other employees behaving. I think you have as most people that follow the mainstream not is what considered an healthy food balance, normally very high on carbohydrates like refine sugars and starchy foods.
The problem in my opinion is in the mode of snark comments you receive on what you're eating, and not giving you advice on how to improve yourself.
I think that unfortunately you are in a bad position and you are in the position of the lazy fat guy or some such. I think you should in the medium term seek a new workplace, or if it's possible for you to go to eat outside. Maybe the nice girl at the grocery store is more bell behaved...
edited 6 hours ago
David K
24.4k1584124
24.4k1584124
answered 6 hours ago
Michele L'IntenditoreMichele L'Intenditore
493
493
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13
Yes, who doesn't want to fit in?
– Namelom
7 hours ago
7
As for the "Syrup in my soda" issue, I'd be guessing they're referring to High Fructose Corn Syrup, which is an artificial sweetener found in a whole lot of different foods in the US. But there do exist some sodas without it,, so if that matters to you, you can look up some of the other brands. But of course, nobody should be mocking you over what you drink.
– Davy M
5 hours ago
13
@DavyM - High Fructose Corn Syrup is no more artificial than sugar is.
– brhans
4 hours ago
4
@brhans: If it had been sugar they would've probably commented on the sugar in soda. i.e. I don't think it was singling out HFCS as being worse than sugar.
– Mehrdad
4 hours ago
4
@brhans You're one of them, aren't you! A corn lobbyist shilling for big corn! :P In all seriousness, though, the site you referenced is an open advocacy group for HFCS, so I would take their claims with a grain of sugar. I still believe you're right, but if you were wrong, that site would be the last one to bring it up.
– bvoyelr
4 hours ago